“Have confidence in yourself, think big, and aim for the stars, at the very least you might reach the moon,” this is my motto. I believe unrealistic goals are actually easier to attain than realistic goals. Apply this to your daily life and before you know it your life will change. Let me explain.
Imagine you are at a night club and you survey the scene and spot two guys, one is an 8 out of 10 and the other is a perfect 10. Who do you think will get hit on the most? If you guessed the guy who is a 10, you are wrong. Most people will settle for the 8 because they think the hottest guy in the club is ‘untouchable’ and you figure your chances are lower. Actually your chances are higher meeting the 10 because everyone won’t have the confidence to try.
I have a friend who runs a start-up company and is hiring all levels in the company. He tells me that he gets many job applications for entry level positions at $40k salary and rarely gets a application or interest in the $100k+ range positions. Some may say it could be the lack of experience, I say it is lack of confidence.
In everything I do in life, I live by this motto and urge others to do the same. Some may think I’m crazy and others may think I’m a clever, but I never settle for less. Try it, you never know where might end up. Think outside the box and Image bigger and better things for yourself and those around you.
Man
You look great in nudes, but your everyday pictures in clothes are really nice as well.
Our fashion taste is similar, actually!
Would love to exchange some (short is fine) mails.
Let me know whne you are coming to Asia, I will try to attend the events, you shoud try Age-Ha in Tokyo, quite amazinng city!
Am also trying to use your e-book training tips!
(^_^)V
You know, I have to be honest…I never would have thought to approach you or (anyone like you) in a club.
It IS extremely intimidating. However, you make a valid point, and I’m now curious to put this to the test… 🙂
Very nice.These sentences encourage me very much.
Hey Peter, you write that you ‘never settle for less.’ but a couple of weeks ago you wrote about your new minimal life-style.. which you described as, ‘less is more.’ It would seem that ‘less’ is desirable in some situations.. but should be avoided in others. Something seems contradictory.
Thanks to your genetic makeup and your long-time physical regimen, you’re handsome and hunky. Most people do not posses your good looks and superior physical characteristics, and would most likely feel uncomfortable approaching a stranger who is obviously more attractive than they are.
But we can all try to be more than who and what we presently are. George Eliot was the pen name of Marian Evans. She wrote that ‘its never too late to be who you might have been.’ Yet when it came time to attach her name to her writings, she chose to deceive her readers about her real name and gender. She chose not to appear to be who she was, because she wasn’t ‘confident’ she’d be accepted by her male peers.
Confidence, and it’s components are trickier stuff than what this simplistic post would suggest. It must be combined and influenced by experience to be realistic and effective. Regardless of my ‘confidence levels’, If I’m not a ‘hottie’ like Peter, chances are more than good that any ‘hottie’ I see at a club isn’t going to seriously consider me dating material. But I am smart and entertaining.. and I might make a new friend if I introduce myself to someone new, and start up a conversation. I think that would take some kind of confidence, even if it’s not based upon my appearance, just to do that.
Hey Jack,
Thanks for the great comment, but I don’t think there is any contradiction because in the previous article I’m talking about being a minimalist and not needing a lot of material things to identify myself with success. In this article I’m talking about setting goals for yourself and making sure you set your goals high even if they seem unrealistic to attain.
As for Marian Evans (aka George Eliot), her decision to use a pen name had nothing to do with lack of ‘confidence.’ She was a woman living in the Victorian age having an affair with a married man (whose name she had taken) and she wanted to distance herself from all of the other women writers of the time who were writing fictional romance novels. But I’m glad you brought her up, because she set her goals unrealistically high and she accomplished many of them by the time she died.
Confidence is not complicated, but it is very sexy. So the next time you see a hot guy go up to him and ask him if you can buy him a drink. If you never even try, I guarantee you will never succeed. And believe me, even I strike out once in a while, but I never stop trying.
-- Peter
Peter, Thanks for your great comment too, and thanks for the additional background on Marian Evans decision to publish her writing using a man’s name. ( I didn’t know she took the name of her lover. )
I am aware of the differences of settling for less, and needing less. I invented a contradiction in some thoughts from your recent posts that didn’t exist.. what I noted wasn’t accurate.. and too cute by half. Your correction was justified and insightful. My bad.
I still think confidence is complicated. I agree it’s sexy, but so is power, and money, and intelligence, and attractive looks, imposing physicality, and charm. All of that combines and contributes to a person’s level of confidence.
I’ve always taken the initiative to meet whoever I was attracted to.. and I’ve learned to accept the occasional rejection I sometimes get in ways that don’t deflate my spirit.. or ruin an evening.
The drink offer is a good ice-breaker, but I usually hold off till I feel there’s some chemistry between us. If I determine that I want to extend the encounter, that’s when I’ll offer to buy another round of whatever we’re drinking.
Thanks for your very personal reply Peter. 😉