Grow Some Balls Buddy

My buddy Mikey is very fortunate, he has an awesome career, plenty of money, is handsome, fit, and women are always trying to get into his pants. Mikey is a real catch. But he has one major flaw; he can’t break a girl’s heart. You would think this is a good attribute for a guy, right?

Mikey likes to party, even more than me and he is always meeting new women. Most of the time they are fine with a one night stand, but there is always one or two a year that think, “I’m going to marry this guy.” He’s had a couple that wanted to talk about having a baby after the second date! But none of these girls can compare to the current girl.

Mikey met this smoking hot 24 year old redhead at a club in San Francisco. I talked to him a couple of weeks later and he was still with her. After a month, they were living together and he told me that he’s not even attracted to her anymore. The problem is every time he tries to break up with her, she cries and acts all crazy.

So he called me up and asked my advice. I told him, “Tell her you have an STD or even better, tell her that you love her. She will think you are nuts to bring up the L word after only a month together.” Well that was the worse advice I could have given him. The next day he tells her that he loves her; she starts crying because she is so happy and says that she is in love with him too. Then he hears her on the phone talking to her mother saying they are going to get married now. WTF? Talk about jumping to conclusions.

I would like to report that everything is perfect and he got rid of her ass, but that’s not the case. It’s been about 3 months now and they are still together. He is seeing a therapist, trying to figure himself out and work towards telling her the truth. I do feel sorry for the guy but if you can’t stand up for yourself, there’s not much anyone else can do to help. My advice now and what I should have told him from the start is, “Grow some balls buddy.”